The Reluctant Blogger

“Today, everyone’s a Blogger.”

My sister tells me this and I shudder at the thought and cringe as I hear the monotonous, husky, slightly-mocking voice of truth coming out of my younger sister’s mouth.

Oh. Dear. God., I think to myself. Am I part of the very same Hoi Poloi, which I occasionally lash out at, for the seeming self-promotion and love for all things shallow? Freaked out, I go into hiding and go into a self-imposed hiatus from the blogosphere. Cut to a month later and my blog looks like an empty nest, with a parent (a.k.a. me), attempting to fill (in) the void. Haha.

I can be deathly elitist (only when I want to) and quite the B word (also when I want to, but more often, only when I feel it’s necessary). Apart from this, I don’t have much time to write. Thus, when I do, there’s this prodding sense of “Do not waste people’s time by saying something stupid or shallow or whatnot”

So, my sister tells me that nowadays, everyone’s a “blogger” and I’m disgusted. I don’t want to be like “everyone else”. I don’t want to call myself a “blogger”. I refuse to be like the very kind I despise, and yet my conscience tells me it’s probably the ego that’s making me say all these things at the moment.

I want to write sensible things and yet sometimes, I can be thinking random and blurting out stupid things. I don’t want to waste time and yet that’s sort of what I’m doing as we speak. I tell myself I’m not like everyone else, and yet deep inside, a part of me knows that I could be like everyone else. 

Ewww. Kill. Me. Now.

But wait, do tell me, have you found yourself…

Joining the bandwagon?

Carefully choosing profile pictures or crafting stats that we know may receive the most reception or reaction(s)…?

Secretly stalking the people we can’t tell we like or hate or whatever…?

Playing coy and replying “No, look at you!” or “No, you’re sexier” when given a compliment, instead of just simply saying THANK YOU?

I gross myself out. Really. I refuse to be part of the crowd and yet I somehow end up in it. I refuse and yet budge. I refuse to blog, and here I am doing the very thing. Well, the least I can do is be honest right? If I must blog, I might as well be ‘downright dirty’ and honest with how I feel or what I think. It’s the least I can do for wasting people’s precious time anyway. Ha-ha.

Love,

The Reluctant Blogger.

/Chos.

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