I got stung today.

Allow me to share with you the incredibly random and painful experience of having a bee/wasp/hoverfly pierce my side this afternoon.

A few minutes after lunch, the company gathered towards the piano to run through our songs for the Saturday show. As I sang gleefully with the rest, I was interrupted by a burning and piercing sensation on my left side.

The initial thought was, “Oooooh what is that?”

I couldn’t figure out if it was painful or otherwise. (At this point, it felt like a needle, a pin going through my skin.) I looked down, wondering if my name tag had gone through my leotard. Nope.

A few seconds.

“Oh shit, ow, ow, OW!! What the F*%$ is that??”

I look down again and I find Naomi swatting the damn thing off my left side as we both go into a brief frenzy of panic and “What to do??? What to do!!??” Naomi successfully swats the thing off as I bend over in pain.

I didn’t quite know what hit me. Or stung me, to be more specific.

Fast Forward to the Security Office at GSA.

Security Dude: Yes, what’s the situation?

Christina: She’s been stung. Can you please take us to the A&E at the Hospital?

Security Dude: Oh yeah? You’re the second today! We really gotta check if there’s a nest growing in that room.

In my head, I’m going… “Wow.. that makes me feel special, Mister. Now can we cut to the chase and go to the hospital? NOW???”

As he calls for transportation, I desperately grit my teeth and attempt to grin away the pain. Not quite effective.

Security Dude: Hmmm. Let’s see. They’re all pretty tied up there so… I don’t really know how we can get you to the hospital. Maybe I can have a look at it? (takes out a pack of plastic gloves)

Christina and I look at each other.

Christina: Uhhh…She was stung inside her leotard. She’ll have to remove her…

(Me in my head: “If you think I’m getting naked here, you must be out of your mind. No fricking way.”)

Security Dude: Oh well… I dunno what we can do… (He starts fidgeting with his walkie talkie and tries looking busy)

Me in my head again: “Thanks for all the help, Sir! You’re useless.”

Christina, the angel that she is, pulls me aside and takes me to the loo. She takes a look at the area, which was swelling up at this point. She leaves me for a while and successfully finds someone who could take us to the hospital.

Fast forward. Royal Surrey County Hospital, A&E Room (Accidents and Emergencies)

Disclaimer: I have never been in a freak accident, emergency (Thank you God, for that!) or anything of that sort. So, the whole process and environment of the Emergency Room was rather new and ironically fascinating for me.)

We get to the Emergency Room and luckily, it’s empty. Christina and I head straight to the counter. The receptionist, kept her head down, as if avoiding any eye contact. We wait a few minutes while she carelessly “types” away. As I begin to half-hallucinate in pain, the receptionist starts to look dowdier and older to the pained and frustrated patient in me.

Finally, a word from the woman.

Receptionist: Are you waiting to be booked?

Christina: Yes. She’s been stu…

Receptionist: Go wait behind the red line.

(We turn around and see that there’s actually NO ONE in line, behind her oh-so-special red line)

Me in my head: “REALLY NOW?? Is this really the time to be so stingy about rules??”

We go behind the red line, where we’re literally the only people in line.

Christina whispers: “Well, she’s being a pain.”

A few moments after.

Receptionist: You can come forward now.

We do as we’re told.

As I desperately try to conceal whatever discomfort and disdain I had with her, she starts asking me for ALL my details. And makes me write some as well.

Full Name. Age. Birth Date. Current Residence. Home Address. Nationallity. Contact Number….blah blah blah…

Me in my head..“Must we really do this now? Can’t I fill you in later and tell you my life story… when I’m hopefully still alive???”

There she was, the hurly, burly, surly woman that she was, prolonging my agony, with the question and answer portion. And there I was, hoping the interrogation would end soon.

Fast Forward. Emergency Room Waiting Area.

A man, looking so pale and in pain. An old lady, with a bloody gash on her chin.

My name finally gets called. “Isabella Yosey?”

Inside the room, things took a turn for the better. I was treated by the nicest nurse and given medication quickly so that the pain would subside. While she did ask me some more questions about my medical history and current medication (if any), I found her endearingly inquisitive. I almost choked on the pill though when she asked about whatever drugs I was taking…

“Birth Control?”

Me: Hahaha! NO. (Proud virgin much?)

Fast Forward. Exiting the Hospital.

I wanted to scream, “I’m alive! I’m alive!”

After the ordeal of getting to the hospital and the hell that was the receptionist, I walked out of the hospital, still in pain, but feeling nothing but gratitude, armed with nothing but my megawatt smile and a fresh experience to take home with me.

I figured,